Did you know that no two women are the same? No really. It isn’t just a cliché or a nice platitude. All women are different. They have different talents, different interests, different families, different responsibilities, different appearances, different weaknesses, different life experiences, etc. Need I go on?
As a young girl, in my teens and early twenties, I found joy in my many different roles as an employee for several different companies. I loved to work. I had crazy jobs that ranged from working at a plasma center, administration in the ER and even dressing as the Easter bunny in the mall. Yes I know, Easter is not about a bunny, but they paid well for me to sweat it up while I held crying children that were traumatized forever by my 5′ 10” bunny self. Like I said, I always enjoyed working. It is just the way God wired me. It was an area of my life that I was passionate about pursuing. After I had my boys, Kam and I realized that working regular hours was no longer going to be an option for me. Kam had a packed full schedule and while I loved working, I valued the chance to take our boys to school and pick them up. So I did the hard thing. I quit a perfectly good job.
While I wouldn’t change that very difficult decision, I quickly found that the stay at home mom role was not my finest. Every woman has natural talents and this was not mine. I struggled with guilt about my lack of desire to be home. I felt a little less a part of the feminine world as it seems there are some things that the world consider true of all women: 1. We love salad. 2. We want to hold every baby. 3. And we want to be home. What kind of girl was I? 1. I don’t like salad. 2. I don’t ask to hold random babies. 3. I not only dislike being home, I am not good at it.
While I limped along as a stay at home mom, time went by, and my youngest son started kindergarten. Shortly after he started school, I was offered a part time job. It was as if the heavens had opened and angels were singing. This was my chance to work again. I was gaining some adult freedom. It would be just two days a week with people that I love. Done deal! Sign me up. I had this nagging fear that my brain had lost all ability to do grown up work, but I love a challenge so I pushed ahead with my new part time job.
Last fall, I found myself with yet another job offer. I could feel in my heart that I wanted to say yes, but wanted to pray about it. My heart is to be where God wants me, whether that is at home or in an office (yes, please). As I took time to answer the offer I talked with friends and family about this offer. While some could hear the excitement in my voice, others seemed overwhelmed at the thought of me taking on a second job. Did I mention that part? I would have two part time jobs. I was disappointed to hear a pause in their voice and questions about how it would all work out.
I continued to pray because I felt strong about giving a responsible answer. It does an employer no good for me to say yes, only to realize it is too much. As I prayed I told God my frustration about my friends’ reactions. And then we had this conversation that was so clear. God asked me if I had ever been given news from a friend that excited them and ignited a passion in their heart, only for me to react with caution and a sense of being overwhelmed by their news.
I immediately thought back to a time when a friend at church came to tell me she was pregnant with her third child. Not only was she pregnant with her third child, but her second was only a couple of months old. I distinctly remember just staring at her. At one point in our conversation she said, “If there isn’t a congratulations in the near future, I am going to find someone else to tell.” She was joking, but I wasn’t giving her much to work with.
I was guilty of the very thing I was complaining to God about. Then I remembered another friend telling me that she and her family, which included 4 kids and a husband, were moving to Russia to be missionaries. Again, I do not recall giving a celebratory scream at that point in the conversation. I know you all want me to be your friend now. I truly do love to encourage but my honest thoughts tend to outweigh my game face.
Don’t you love it when God teaches you a lesson while you are diligently giving him your prayer requests about lessons that you feel others should be learning? This was officially about me. God so sweetly moved me to 1 Corinthians 12:14 where the Bible talks about the different parts of the body. Each part of the body is different. Each part looks and functions differently. I can only imagine that if an ear could be asked to see or to smell, it would be a bit overwhelming. The ear would wonder how that would even be possible. I can imagine it would have more questions than answers.
As women, while we have some fun similarities, we are still different. Remember the first paragraph. I mentioned we are all different. God is asking you to live in the greatness of where He has called you. Sometimes, looking at other women and their callings causes us to feel overwhelmed, but their callings are not ours to live out. I think a lesson without a Bible story to support it is just some warm fuzzy feelings, so let’s look at Ruth. Ruth chose to go with Naomi and use her God given strength of loyalty to do something hard. She left all that was comfortable around her to follow a bitter old women. It was not the ‘common sense’ thing to do. She probably had a friend or two that didn’t jump at her news to go with Naomi to a foreign land. I wonder how Ruth’s conversations with Orpah sounded. If you notice, Orpah, Naomi’s other daughter-in-law did not rush to follow Naomi. Ruth knew that she was to go with Naomi to a land that was not her own with a women that was filled with bitterness and ready to give up. God blessed Ruth’s faithfulness to go where He had called her.
Be encouraged that God has called you to do things and go places where He hasn’t called others. It is exciting! And scary! And we sometimes want to compare it with what others are doing. Ruth did not hear God call her to go with Naomi, only to ask Orpah if she thought it was a good idea. While I am sure they talked about their plans, Ruth did not waver from God’s call on her life. As women, we need each other as cheerleaders that don’t stop cheering when we don’t understand the play book! Our ability to cheer for our friends should not depend on whether or not their choices and calling would work for us. We should be friends that remember that a girl and her God can do anything!
Click here to see the article online: Studio G Winter 2016