This week was marked with a sad goodbye. We knew it would happen eventually but were surprised by the emotions that came with it. Our treadmill saw its final run. There was no warning, so I didn’t appreciate our last hurrah the way I would have. I was probably not even paying attention to the run. I knew the day would come when it would no longer go, but after 16 years you start to wonder if it will last forever.
We didn’t name our treadmill, but in hindsight I feel like we should have. We shared a countless amount of time and miles together. We were together through every season of life, literally. Our treadmill has been a part of our lives since well before either of our boys came on the scene. While the treadmill was never named, it has always been a she to me. She has seen me through so much. I have worked out many a hard times and lots of difficult news pounding my feet as her belt turned. She has seen me through physical therapy and was happy to allow me to walk after I tore my acl. She carried me when I weighed a million pregnant with my two gentle giants. Few could do that. She has been the safe place when I needed to hear from God. I have readied many articles as I sweat it out on her tread. While I love the feeling after a good run, the actual event is hard. It has always put me in a place where I am acutely aware that I need a big God to help me through.
My strange emotional attachment to my treadmill is not simply based on the time I have spent with her, it is her story and how she came to be mine. When Kam and I got married, I was about 5 weeks out from running my first marathon. I was not going to be winning any medals for my speed, just for completion, but I had fallen in love with distance running. Our first few years of marriage we lived in apartments in some less than ideal places to run. We were both finishing our degrees and living on a small budget. Kam has always been protective of me and did not want me running outside by myself. Often times he would run with me. With Kam as my jogging partner, I was safe. Unfortunately, I was hitting high mileage and our schedules did not always mesh to fit in the amount of runs that I needed to train. Kam earned some extra money and I am sure you can guess what he did. He surprised me with my very own treadmill. It was such a huge sacrifice. I knew there were so many other things we needed and lots of things he had on his wish list. I can promise that a treadmill has never been on Kam’s Christmas list. This gift was a huge sacrifice and I couldn’t have felt more loved.
Over the years, I became more and more sappy about that crazy treadmill. It is amazing what that sweet gift could do when we had an argument. There is nothing like sweating it out and trying to stay mad at someone who sacrificially bought the item you are running on. It has been such a big reminder. Literally! When the enemy would love to divide us and have me think that Kam is not for me, this huge piece of equipment in the garage would remind me of how wrong he was and continues to be!!
This sad goodbye has brought up a conversation that Kam and I have had before in other areas of life. Was it a sacrifice or an investment? While Kam made a huge sacrifice to keep me safe, he also made a huge investment in our marriage. I would say it paid off.
I often talk to mom’s struggling with their new normal day to day life that includes staying home with their kids. It feels like such a big sacrifice. That is because it is!! But it is also an investment.
While the words ‘sacrifice’ and ‘investment’ seem to describe similar transactions in life, they can totally change your perspective. Sacrificing your energy, money and time is a real thing but it is simply highlighting what you are giving up. Investing is the positive look at what you are giving up and points to the gains that will come. It is looking to how that sacrifice will influence your future. Investing allows you to deal with the current pain of sacrifice in order to see a different result in an area of your life. If you choose to give up or sacrifice cable television to invest that money in a long term account, understanding it is an investment allows you to cope with the pain of missing “Fixer Upper.” Focusing on investing can change the attitude of your heart in the midst of the sacrifice.
I know Kam realized that spending a few hundred dollars on a treadmill meant he would not be able to buy whatever new software or equipment he had been wanting. I love that he valued ‘us’ more. I am not sure he even knew the return he would get on his investment. I have fallen in love with him more and more running on that treadmill.
A great illustration of this principle in the Bible is the principle of sowing and reaping. We don’t use these terms in everyday vernacular, but they are mentioned throughout the Bible to help us understand this important concept. When we sow, we are sacrificing/investing in some way. When we reap, we are benefiting from our investment/sacrifice. At the end of Proverbs 31, the last verse says, “Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.” The Proverbs 31 woman sacrificed her time, her energy and her talents for her family and her community and it was an investment with a big return. Her children called her blessed, her husband praised her and the Bible, the inspired Word of God, says she surpassed women that were living excellently.
What about Jesus? Do we see this idea holding true with his life? Hebrews 12:2 says, “Looking to Jesus, the founder and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame and is, seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” Jesus endured the ultimate sacrifice and the Bible says he was looking to the joy set before him. His sacrifice was an investment for the future. The message version says, “he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God.”
Frame the attitude of your heart so that you see your sacrifice as an investment.